The Database Script in Notes 4.5 has a PostDocumentDelete event which is called when documents are deleted. You can use it to automatically delete response documents associated with a document:
Sub PostDocumentDelete(Source As NotesUIDatabase) Dim db As NotesDatabase Dim doc As NotesDocument Dim coll As NotesDocumentCollection Dim coll2 As NotesDocumentCollection Dim curdoc As NotesDocument Set db = source.Database Set coll2 = source.Documents For x = 1 To coll2.Count Set curdoc = coll2.GetNthDocument(x) Set coll = curdoc.Responses If coll.count > 0 Then Call coll.RemoveAll(True) Next End Sub